Rhedwy on the Books [13 Hispis 4261]
I was in the library, idly reading Impractical Uses of Destroc -- a most engrossing tome -- when I should have been studying. Suddenly my whole right flank was thoroughly swatted by fur! Rhedwy had snuck up on me and flapped me with her tail.
Me:"Why, hello there, Rhedwy. What brings me the pleasure of your company this fine afternoon?" (A more literal transcription might be "awk!" followed by both Rhedwy and me extinguishing page 73 of Impractical Uses of Destroc.)
Rhedwy poured herself upwards, forming a puddle on the top of a bookshelf. "Two days from now we have the small social gathering, underneath many howling Rassimel heads. There is food there, there is inferior brandy in small quantities there, there is I think a potted plant or two bearing berries, which are presents from the families of my roommates, although they are not there now. This last is a consequence of having two Herethroy as roommates."
Me:"I hadn't noticed. I have only one Herethroy as a roommate, and zie doesn't get presents."
Rhedwy:"You are living with Dustweed, in the Home for People of Rare Genders!"
Me:"I prefer not to be thought of that way."
Rhedwy:"When I am just as old as you, I finally learn to care what people think of me!"
Me:"Um ... Rhedwy? I'm not very old."
Rhedwy:"I know! I am the older prime! Never am I just as old as you. Never do I learn to care what most people think of me. It is the very important lesson, everybody says, but it is not a lesson that is taught in Vheshrame Academy and I do not yet find a private tutor."
Me:"I didn't know Sleeth ever cared what people thought of them."
Rhedwy:"I care what Seeks-New-Name-Every-Day Strenata thinks of me! Even what you think of me. Just not very much. Caring is very hard without hands!"
Me:"Carrying and caring both, I should think."
Rhedwy:"Carrying is not so bad. Picking up is so bad."
Me:"I understand! I haven't managed to pick anyone up yet!"
Rhedwy:"Strenata is the squirmy and evasive Orren!"
Me:"Every Orren is the squirmy and evasive Orren."
Rhedwy:"Once I catch an Orren, rrai!"
Me:"What did you do with the Orren?"
Rhedwy:"I do the same thing you do with one when you catch one. Feed fish! Bat words back and forth! Find private place where nearby people do not hear too much yowling!"
Me:[Worried]"It wasn't Strenata...?"
Rhedwy:"I laugh now! Coupling with a Sleeth is not such a social catastrophe as all that -- I do it often enough, and my rank and standing in the court does not change! Yes, it is Strenata, but no, it is not Seeks-Highly-Textured-Wallpaper Strenata."
Me:"She changed her name for the occasion?"
Rhedwy:"Only for a special occasion does she not change her name! But no. I do not get to play with mammal girls. My tongue is very very rough, and and I have no hands."
Me:"I hardly know how I shall endure life with such knowledge."
Rhedwy:"Excellent! Every Sleeth enjoys torturing people now and then, and I now inflict infinite torture on someone! Sythyry, you must come to our party! There I torture you all the more!"
Me:"Right, the party."
Me:"I detect subtle forms of social manipulation here!"
Rhedwy:"Very subtle! More subtle than I am capable of!"
Me:"This, despite the fact that you just did them."
Rhedwy:"Ah! But Seeks-A-Bowl-Of-Sprat-And-Cherry-Soup tells me to say this."
Me:"I am trapped! I must then come!"
Rhedwy:"This is the excellent thing."
Me:"I look forward to it with all available trepidation!"
Rhedwy:"I hope that your supply is plentiful!"