Sythyry (sythyry) wrote,
Sythyry
sythyry

OOC: It's like a story!

It's a disaster!

What's a disaster?
2(11.8%)
Of course it is: it's your life
4(23.5%)
No, it's just my face.
4(23.5%)
Actually it's lunch
7(41.2%)

An unearthly knocking raps at the door!

On such a night as this, who could it be -- or what?
1(5.9%)
The aliens are coming, and they are polite!
6(35.3%)
The spirits of the vengeful dead!
2(11.8%)
The spirits of the horny dead, come to knock us up!
2(11.8%)
What could 'unearthly' possibly mean about a knocking?
6(35.3%)

What monster is that within yon evil egg, hatching slowly, hatching?

The cockatrice
3(17.6%)
The catoblepas
5(29.4%)
Frankenstein's Monster, who was just taking a nap in an evil egg
3(17.6%)
Osama Bin Laden, whose body was hidden there for safekeeping
2(11.8%)
Hydrogen sulphide; the egg is rotten
4(23.5%)

The wicked man spying upon us from atop yon radio tower is…

Dastardly Dan
2(11.8%)
Sinister Sam
3(17.6%)
Menacing Marvin
1(5.9%)
Ominous Olivia (in drag)
3(17.6%)
kinda cute really.
8(47.1%)

At every step our attempt to make a better world is thwarted by

Professor Moriarity
2(11.8%)
Al Qaeda
0(0.0%)
evil corporations
2(11.8%)
evil politicians
1(5.9%)
the laws of physics
5(29.4%)
the heroes of the story; we seem to be the villains
7(41.2%)

Oh, no! The expendable minor character has been murdered! What could have done him-or-her in?

The terrible monster
0(0.0%)
The secret shapeshifting monster for the surprising plot twist
4(23.5%)
Choking on an infernal potato chip
3(17.6%)
Suicide
1(5.9%)
Ennui
4(23.5%)
Actually he's not dead, just in a sort of medically-induced coma induced by the fryer's drug.
5(29.4%)

... "fryer"?

No, the friar
10(62.5%)
Yes, the Magic Negro working as short-order chef
6(37.5%)

The menace rings us closer and closer!

We must construct a flying machine and escape!
4(23.5%)
We must slip through the sewers and escape!
0(0.0%)
We must fight our way out with a display of manly fisticuffs!
1(5.9%)
We must be rescued at the last minute by the Assistant Hero!
3(17.6%)
Answer the phone with "Hallo, Menace!"
9(52.9%)

I am wracked with doubts and uncertainties! Can you comfort me?

Your cause is just; your methods are noble; your breath is pleasant.
4(23.5%)
Plaid pants and striped shirt look good on you, unlike on anyone else.
1(5.9%)
She's probably not pregnant, really.
4(23.5%)
He will call you shortly; he just doesn't want to seem to be stalking you
3(17.6%)
No.
5(29.4%)

A new and more terrible menace arises!

It's Cthulhu!
0(0.0%)
It's a cheap Cthulhu imitation with the serial numbers filed off!
6(35.3%)
It's Godzilla!
1(5.9%)
It's Al Qaeda!
1(5.9%)
It's a Democratic or Republican President!
5(29.4%)
It's your Evil Twin!
4(23.5%)

Time for a romantic interlude!

A longing glance and quick kiss with the opposite-sex lead
0(0.0%)
A longing glance and quick kiss with the same-sex lead
4(23.5%)
Actually I'd rather die from an overdose of triteness
1(5.9%)
Fisticuffs is all the romance I need!
2(11.8%)
squeeka-squeeka-squeeka-squeeka-…
10(58.8%)

Time for a romantic Unicode!

2(11.8%)
7(41.2%)
1(5.9%)
3(17.6%)
4(23.5%)

An unexpected plot twist has occurred!

The regiment happened to be practicing maneuvers that day!
3(17.6%)
Two characters are actually twins!
1(5.9%)
A meteor has fallen upon someone important!
5(29.4%)
The landlord was actually an alien invader from Mars!
6(35.3%)
That "romantic gesture" was the last flower in the world!
2(11.8%)

The dragons are coming!

Those aren't dragons. They're mutant pterodactyls from the mad science lab.
0(0.0%)
Those aren't dragons. They're dragonflies.
3(17.6%)
No, they're just breathing fire.
2(11.8%)
We're doomed!
1(5.9%)
Yay, company!
11(64.7%)

The narrative comes to an end!

Yay, some of probably survived!
4(23.5%)
We must wait eagerly for the next installment!
7(41.2%)
Not a moment too soon!
0(0.0%)
But revisions do not!
6(35.3%)
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