Which would you least hate to meet in a dark alley?
A dark alien
4(19.0%)
A darker alley
2(9.5%)
Satin
12(57.1%)
Satan
1(4.8%)
Seitan
2(9.5%)
If you could have a highly focussed love affair, which aspect would you most like it to focus on?
Sexuality
6(28.6%)
Activities
4(19.0%)
Mental aspects
4(19.0%)
Culinary aspects
0(0.0%)
Spiritual concordance
4(19.0%)
Psionic communion
3(14.3%)
Predestiny
0(0.0%)
What species of giant monster would you most like to attack Tokyo this week?
Koala Bear
3(14.3%)
Millipede
5(23.8%)
Axtolotl
3(14.3%)
Toaster
4(19.0%)
Concerto
6(28.6%)
Obama and Putin are playing a duet in front of the U.N.! What instruments do they use?
Piano four hands
3(14.3%)
Ukelele and Balalaika
2(9.5%)
Electric guitars
8(38.1%)
Theramins
7(33.3%)
Beer bottles
1(4.8%)
You must choose which of three people will be your next lover, based entirely on photographs of one body part! Which body part do you want photographed?
Left Knee
2(10.0%)
Right Ear
10(50.0%)
Tongue-Tip
4(20.0%)
Spleen
3(15.0%)
X-chromosome
1(5.0%)
You get to copulate with the movie star of your choice, in a setting chosen from the following menu!
Mare Tenebris (on the moon)
3(15.0%)
Marianas Trench
1(5.0%)
Olympus Mons (Mars)
4(20.0%)
The s1 orbital of a hydrogen atom
8(40.0%)
Balrog's lair, Moria, Middle-Earth
4(20.0%)
You get to save a Nubile Personage in Distress -- but from what?
Falling into a pool of lube
0(0.0%)
Getting impaled by a dildo-horned unicorn
7(33.3%)
Getting eaten (the nice way) by a troll
1(4.8%)
Getting sold as a slave in the Society of Super-Gentle Dominance
5(23.8%)
Drinking a Potion of Even More Nubility
8(38.1%)
Which of the following provides the most erotic encouragement to you?
Wagnerian opera
5(23.8%)
The scent of vinegar
2(9.5%)
A box of chocolate-covered cheese curds
3(14.3%)
A new iPhone
3(14.3%)
A pile of glass jars
8(38.1%)
