Sythyry (sythyry) wrote,
Sythyry
sythyry

Acquiring Saza [8 Trandary 4386]

Mirrored from Sythyry.

Dear Coz,
I’ve come up with a bit of a problem involving some greater nobility, some Mentador, some ritual magic, and some long-dead wizard or other, and I was wondering if you could help me out. You see, there’s this Prince of Barency — Prince Rastomil, I think you’ll remember him as the exceedingly princely sort of fellow who filled out a waistcoat with a vengance. He seems to look better in a bustier just now. And the body with the waistcoat we have to keep unconscious, or the long-dead wizard will get annoying and uppity. Anyhow, yes, it’s Mentador ritual magic, but it’s an entirely proper use of it, since it’s putting a prince back in his proper body. Even our garumphious grandparents can’t gargue and gargle too much about it — it might even be a bit [g]redemptive even, ’cause who but you could fix this prince to right?
I remain
Yr loving and doomed cousin,
Sythyry

And I sent along a copy of many diary pages, and a lot of technical details.

And right back in the next post:

Dear Coz!
What a treat and a surprise! I am so tickled that you’d have a prince horribly enchanted and imprisoned, just to make an excuse for me to visit! I am delighted to accept! But is there anything you can do to make the situation more dire? I have come up with a bountiful new crop of creditors, and I should be ever so happy to crop the crop. Either in the snippy or the whippy sense of ‘crop’, I’m not too fussy.
I remain
Yr loving and penurious cousin,
Saza

To which I could but answer:

Dear Coz,

I should be utterly delighted to manufacture a diplomatic incident between Barency and Hanija, the one of them whining about how they used to have a prince and now he’s a raddled — if not downright addled — noblewoman, with no resemblance whatever to the royal family of Barency. Hanija will probably whine right back about how he wasn’t so much of a “prince” as an “embarrassment”, and how he has been rendered utterly unsuitable for marriage, just as Barency requested. Barency will surely explain — but I surely need say no more. Sometime in the diplomatic discussions, I’m sure that they would forget to hire you — spending, instead, the same money on having a remote war. Perhaps, if you were lucky, they would catapult your creditors. So of course I heartily recommend you convert them into effective and delightful missiles as quickly as possible.
I remain
Yr loving and incoherent cousin,
Sythyry

To which the reply was rather more explicit…

Dear coz!
I’ll be there as quick as my traditional-but-boring geese can pull my traditional-but-boring gazebo! If you choose to interpret this as an unseemly urgency that I “commiserate” with your “calliope”, or, perhaps even that I be permitted to “encypher” your “enamel” — as some Zi Ri do to other Zi Ri! — please be aware that I am replacing the actual words with some harmless and unrelated ones and that what I actually want to do with, to, about, above, and beneath you is quite different and quite [un]remarkable.
I remain
Yr loving and loving cousin,
Saza

Oh, dear. There could be some problems…

Dear coz!
The logistics of doing what, in fact, I actually want to do beneath, above, about, to, and with you are going to be a bit remarkable. When you arrive, I must remember to tell you how it was that I got married, and how I got my wings smashed for adultery.
I remain
Yr loving and doomed cousin,
Sythyry

Zie didn’t reply quite instantly, but when zie did, zie was wrong:

Dear coz!
I suppose I shall find some way to say very little about Wingsa. There is no great love between zir and myself, for reasons which are as tawdry as they are outdated. In any case, I must apologize for introducing you to cisaffection, if you so quickly hurl yourself into marriage with the first Zi Ri you meet! I suppose I shall find some way to say very little about Wingsa. Best if you do not show zir this letter.
I remain
Yr loving and astonished cousin,
Saza

To which I had to reply instantly:

Dear coz!
Wingsa has nothing to do with the matter! Zie does not approve of my marriage. I am Arfaen’s tofyof now and for the next seven years. Which is an absolute impediment to any sort of activity such as you allude to within the next seven years, within the boundaries of Hanija Mene. And I suppose it would be polite to ask her permission if you and I should somehow chance to take a trip to past or future, or some other part of some universe or other.
I remain
Yr loving and overcomplicated cousin,
Sythyry

Saza is, of course, Saza.

Dear coz!
I am much relieved that you continue in the rakish and eccentric style that I have grown to love, admire, and dread. I can hardly wait to see what new calamities await us in Hanija!
I remain
Yr loving and comparatively direct cousin,
Saza

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