Sythyry (sythyry) wrote,
Sythyry
sythyry

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First Day, part 11 [1 Trandary 4261]

In Havune's room, various people had decked Broon out with leaves, mostly dried yilliat leaves from the market and evergreen boughs. (Where are you supposed to find fresh leaves this time of year? It is spring, but it's not eighteen hours into spring.) They carefully plastered a pair of big yilliat leaves over his eyes, and drew horrible glaring staring charcoal eyes on them. And they lead him out, chanting:

Here we have the Warlord of Leaves,
The Warlord of Leaves owns every muzzle!
Here we have the Warlord of Leaves,
The Warlord of Leaves owns every rump!

The Warlord of Leaves has conquered the flatlands,
The Warlord of Leaves has conquered the lands!
The Warlord of Leaves has conquered the flatlands,
The Warlord of Leaves has conquered the hands!

Tethezai and Dustweed let Leiska out of my bedroom after a while. They had adorned her with every ribbon Dustweed owned, and a fair number of mine considering they hadn't asked me first -- ribbons on her ears, ribbons on her tail, gauzy thin ribbons over her eyes, ribbons on her ankles and wrists and elbows and neck, ribbons on her ribbons on her ribbons. Then they lead her out, chanting:

Make way for the Duchess of Ribbons,
Part like grasses for the Duchess of Ribbons,
Make way for the Duchess of Ribbons,
Part like legs for the Duchess of Ribbons!

The Duchess of Ribbons will conquer the flatlands,
The Duchess of Ribbons will conquer the lands!
The Duchess of Ribbons will conquer the flatlands,
The Duchess of Ribbons will conquer the pants!

And the two blindfolded Cani were given their traditional weapons -- a floppy pine branch for Broon, a stale loaf of bread all tied up in whatever ribbons were left for Leiska -- and they went at it in the middle of the living room. Broon is a head and a half taller than Leiska, and strong enough to lift three of her, and he swished away fearsomely with his floppy pine branch. Of course, he couldn't see a bit, and I daresay that Cani smelling is only so good in a duel. Leiska whacked him with that bread, once-twice-thrice on the cheek and thigh (the end of the loaf broke off) and belly, and over he went. She jumped on his chest, and crumbled breadcrumbs all over his face 'til he was choking and spitting and laughing.

Then everyone else sang the Duchess of Ribbons' song again, only with "has conquered" instead of "will conquer". (I didn't sing 'til the second half; I didn't know the words.) After that, it was time for more port and consomee. Leiska, still the Duchess of Ribbons, mixed the port and consomee, from a special little pottery jug of port. Very nice port and not too much consomee; I had two chalices of it.

She didn't mention that "special" in this case also meant "generously spiked with strong cordial."

Quite a few hours later, I woke up. Someone had thoughtfully arranged me in the livingroom fireplace. Someone had also thoughtfully arranged all five empty jugs of port around me in the fireplace, and each one bigger than me.

I flew over a half-dozen sleeping drunken Cani, artistically arranged all over the living room, and went to my proper bed. This was somewhat unwise, as Dustweed and Tethezai had taken it as a night alone together, and might have chosen more sheets had they expected me to come in in the night.

I do not greatly care, for I am still half-drunk and more than a little ill, Tethezai is improper, and Dustweed is hideous. Tomorrow, I will be sober, Tethezai will be improper, and Dustweed will be hideous. If I were seeking anyone, it would be Seeks-... um ... whatever she seeks.

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