Sythyry (sythyry) wrote,
Sythyry
sythyry

Invincible Fire Demon

Mirrored from Sythyry.

Invincible Fire Demon

Invincible Fire Demon is a chubby Orren lad with a big smile and a small hat. A small purple hat with a wren’s feather tucked in the brim, and seven tiny glass mock-diamonds. The whole hat looked as if it were trying to look like it cost a hundred lozens, but actually barely cost one. I presume he was wearing other clothes. I didn’t dare look beyond the hat actually.

Invincible Fire Demon: “Um … excuse me, O honored Rassimel lad.” He was speaking to Feralan, who was helping out direct our new passengers, due to his supreme comprehension of Locador and consequent ability to find his way around Strayway more easily than anyprime else. “Could you tell me where my cabin is?”

Feralan: “Do you mean that in a friendly or an antagonistic way?”

Invincible Fire Demon: “Friendly, of course. I haven’t any idea how to say that antagonistically.”

Feralan: “Oh, good. Who are you?”

Invincible Fire Demon: “I’m Invincible Fire Demon.”

Feralan:Why are you Invincible Fire Demon?”

Invincible Fire Demon: “Just my name, lad.”

Feralan: “I’ve got a Locador demon.”

Invincible Fire Demon: “Do you really?”

Feralan: “Yes, really. He’s not invincible though.”

Invincible Fire Demon: “I suppose that helps you keep him under control, the threat of death at your fierce spells, does it?”

Feralan: “He’s not under control. I wish he were — invincible I mean. We’d be a lot safer if he were.”

Invincible Fire Demon: “I suppose I see. If utter blindness can be considered a modality of sight.”

Feralan: “But you, you’re not a demon, and you never were?”

Invincible Fire Demon: “No, no, not me. It’s just a name.”

Feralan: “I used to be one. Half of one at least.”

Arfaen: “He was, too.”

Invincible Fire Demon: “Did he get better?”

Arfaen: “Only by the greatest wizardry from our great Captain Sythyry.” (Feralan insisted on repeating that line to me verbatim when he told me about the conversation afterwards. Several times. I think Arfaen is trying to set me up with every Orren possible.) “And the magical backlash of the curing was such that it cast us into another entire universe!”

Invincible Fire Demon: “Oh, my. Does that happen often around here?”

Feralan: “Everyone who sails with Captain Sythyry is doomded — Doomded — DOOMDED!”

Invincible Fire Demon: “I suppose that’s why Mump sent us travelling this way?”

Arfaen: “Most likely. May I ask you why you are called Invincible Fire Demon?”

Invincible Fire Demon: “Oh, everyone does, I think my father gave the universe wholesale permission to ask me about it when he named me that. It’s just a traditional name in my family. I keep trying to change it though, but it never works out right.”

Feralan: “Why not? What happens?”

Invincible Fire Demon: “Well, first I tried to change it to ‘Gossamer Air Angel’, but everyone thought I meant ‘Goosimer’, as in ‘more like a goose’, and kept honking at me and poking my rump, so I gave that up. It was too rebellious anyway. So then I tried going for ‘Moderately Tough and Pleasantly Warm Salamander”, which is sort of like my real name but has the sharp edges blunted off. Everyone thought I was just being wimpy. Then I tried ‘Foff the Flippant Fool of Foolyville’. Nobody argued or complained the least bit. That got me so depressed I switched back to ‘Invincible Fire Demon’, and have kept it from that day to this.”

Feralan: “… really?”

Invincible Fire Demon: “Sort of.”

Feralan: “Well, your room is down that corridor to the left, across the ballroom with the potted palm trees, up the green stairway, down the blue stairway, and all around.”

Invincible Fire Demon: “All around?”

Feralan: “Yes, the blue stairway descends into the middle of your suite. It’s very nice. Except for having a stairway in the middle of it.”

Invincible Fire Demon: “Right then. Cheerio!”

Sizzletap

We asked lots of students and such about Sizzletap. And got lots of answers.

Alzagonde: “He shouldn’t be listed as not-a-student. He is a student. Very much so.”

Hrone: “Sizzletap? He’s in the class. Must be some administrative mistake that he was listed as not being.”

Strappie: “Sizzletap is coming? Excellent, we’ll have the best converstations [sic] then!”

Rastomil: “I personally vouch for Sizzletap — if he gives you the slightest trouble, I shall pay his expenses and damages a dozen times over! Nay, a thousand!”

Wentalilla: “Sizzletap? Not a security risk. Not my problem.”

Vind: “He told me last night he’s not going to come. His seventh aunt fell ill, you see, and Sizzletap had to be at her side. Because she’s rich.”

Cluthe: “I’ve never known Sizzletap to be the least bit interested in other Orren — I have never seen him in the company of one! I suppose that might be why he’s coming along.”

Unispike: “I talked to him this morning. He’ll meet us in Flowdeen on the 18th.”

Arkathia: “Oh, yes. He’s on board already. The boy with the Locador demon sent him to his suite. “

Invincible Fire Demon: “I daresay he won’t be missed back in Barency!”

At which point we were thoroughly confused and bewildered. So we cornered Invincible Fire Demon, who was readily available and looked easy to intimidate despite being Invincible, and interrogated him with some or all of: thumbscrews, pitchforks, clotted cream, Mentador spells, pleading to his better nature, good and bad cops, good and bad and ugly cops, good and bad and ugly and beautiful cops, choking pears, the bastinado, triremes, scones, the pillory, brandy, and the releasing of the ravenous rats. The scones did the trick.

Invincible Fire Demon: “Oh, Sizzletap isn’t a real person at all. He’s a fake student — has been for decades. Students are obligated by custom to pretend he’s real and make up excuses for him as needed. “

Me: “Excellent. I expect to see him gamboling and gambling about with hCevian straightaway.”

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