Originally published at Sythyry. Please leave any comments there.
In Which Vae is a Worse Monster [24 Lage 2461]
Umtangeia — or, rather, the city of Bfelmykh on Umtangeia
– isn’t a very nice place. First of all, I knew it wasn’t
a proper city, because a proper city has
mighty city walls which nobody can teleport through, and Vae
had just teleported us to standing in the middle of a street
without even setting off any sort of alarm that I could hear.
A proper city also has streets made out of split boards or
something else smooth, not just mud.
The buildings in a proper city are elegant and well-made,
and painted and such as that. These weren’t.
But most importantly, the people in a proper city are Orren
and Rassimel and Cani and Herethry and a few other people.
These weren’t. They were blee and mherobump and taptet and
whatnots.
They stared at us. They stared a great deal. They started
talking energetically in a language I didn’t catch more than
one word in thirty of. Those words being “Zi Ri” and
“Orren” of course.
I whined at Vae to take us back ’cause I didn’t speak the
language.
Never, ever say that to a nendrai. Really. Never. Even
more never than the other thing I said never to say to a nendrai.
She turned and said to me,
“If you
can read
this, you’re
too
close” I can’t remember what she said — not even
the least little bit of what it might be about.
I quite cogently said, “What do you mean?”
She grinned a grin that would have looked quite nice on a
real Orren, and said,
“Repeat after me — If you
can read
this, you’re
too close”
So I said, “Um, OK. If you
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<p style="border: 1px solid black; padding: 3px;"><strong>Originally published at <a href="http://sythyry.com/2005/06/425/">Sythyry</a>. Please leave any <a href="http://sythyry.com/2005/06/425/#comments">comments</a> there.</strong></p><h2>In Which Vae is a Worse Monster [24 Lage 2461]</h2>
<p>
Umtangeia — or, rather, the city of Bfelmykh on Umtangeia<br />
– isn’t a very nice place. First of all, I knew it wasn’t<br />
a <b>proper</b> city, because a proper city has<br />
mighty city walls which nobody can teleport through, and Vae<br />
had just teleported us to standing in the middle of a street<br />
without even setting off any sort of alarm that I could hear.
</p>
<p>
A proper city also has streets made out of split boards or<br />
something else smooth, not just mud.
</p>
<p>
The buildings in a proper city are elegant and well-made,<br />
and painted and such as that. These weren’t.
</p>
<p>
But most importantly, the people in a proper city are Orren<br />
and Rassimel and Cani and Herethry and a few other people.<br />
These weren’t. They were blee and mherobump and taptet and<br />
whatnots.
</p>
<p>
They stared at us. They stared a great deal. They started<br />
talking energetically in a language I didn’t catch more than<br />
one word in thirty of. Those words being “Zi Ri” and<br />
“Orren” of course.
</p>
<p>
I whined at Vae to take us back ’cause I didn’t speak the<br />
language.
</p>
<p>
Never, ever say that to a nendrai. Really. Never. Even<br />
more never than the other thing I said never to say to a nendrai.
</p>
<p>
She turned and said to me,<br />
“<span style="color:black; background-color: black">If you</span><br />
<span style="color:black; background-color: black">can read</span><br />
<span style="color:black; background-color: black">this, you’re</span><br />
<span style="color:black; background-color: black">too<br />
close</span>” I can’t remember what she said — not even<br />
the least little bit of what it might be about.
</p>
<p>
I quite cogently said, “What do you mean?”
</p>
<p>
She grinned a grin that would have looked quite nice on a<br />
real Orren, and said,<br />
“Repeat after me — <span style="color:black; background-color: black">If you</span><br />
<span style="color:black; background-color: black">can read</span><br />
<span style="color:black; background-color: black">this, you’re</span><br />
<span style="color:black; background-color: black">too close</span>”
</p>
<p>
So I said, “Um, OK. <span style="color:black;<br />
background-color: black">If you</span> <span<br />
style="color:black; background-color: black">can read</span><br />
<span style="color:black; background-color: black">this,<br />
you’re</span> <span style="color:black; background-color:<br />
black">too close</span>”
</p>
<p>
And she whacked me with her tail, and dumped a big horrible<br />
Mutoc Mentador Spiridor spell on me. I tried very hard to<br />
resist it, but, well, don’t be silly.
</p>
<p>
And I could understand what the monsters around me were<br />
saying.
</p>
<p>
(No, of course that’s impossible. Spells can’t manipulate<br />
languages — languages aren’t real things, in the same way<br />
that a flock of birds or a spoken word is a real thing.<br />
Rather later on, with the help of the Eye of Mirizan and<br />
Melizan and two magic theory professors, we figured out that<br />
she had changed my memory of the phrase “<span style="color:black; background-color: black">If you</span><br />
<span style="color:black; background-color: black">can read</span><br />
<span style="color:black; background-color: black">this, you’re</span><br />
<span style="color:black; background-color: black">too<br />
close</span>“, which she had just given me, to a copy of her<br />
own memory of the local language.)
</p>
<p>
Mentador magic is unambiguously the wickedest of the 7+12<br />
kinds of magic. Mutoc Mentador is arguably the wickedest<br />
kind of Mentador, since it changes your mind and your<br />
thoughts, in ways you can’t necessarily figure out yourself.<br />
Casting a big Mutoc Mentador to rewrite a chunk of someone’s<br />
mind is … like doorwaying on a personal scale. It’s one<br />
of the nastiest, vilest things you can do to someone, even<br />
if there aren’t any bad effects in the end.
</p>
<p>
I will admit that I said a few unkind and ungracious things<br />
to Vae at that point. Indeed, I will admit to going into<br />
a bit of a frantic terrified rage at her, while blee and<br />
mherobump and taptet watched me, quite bemused, and a<br />
wrapped book of stories hovered patiently behind me, and a<br />
truly horrible monster blinked big wide Orren eyes at me and<br />
didn’t understand at all why I might be upset.</p>
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