Sythyry (sythyry) wrote,
Sythyry
sythyry

Originally published at Sythyry. Please leave any comments there.

In Which Vae is a Worse Monster [24 Lage 2461]

Umtangeia — or, rather, the city of Bfelmykh on Umtangeia
– isn’t a very nice place. First of all, I knew it wasn’t
a proper city, because a proper city has
mighty city walls which nobody can teleport through, and Vae
had just teleported us to standing in the middle of a street
without even setting off any sort of alarm that I could hear.

A proper city also has streets made out of split boards or
something else smooth, not just mud.

The buildings in a proper city are elegant and well-made,
and painted and such as that. These weren’t.

But most importantly, the people in a proper city are Orren
and Rassimel and Cani and Herethry and a few other people.
These weren’t. They were blee and mherobump and taptet and
whatnots.

They stared at us. They stared a great deal. They started
talking energetically in a language I didn’t catch more than
one word in thirty of. Those words being “Zi Ri” and
“Orren” of course.

I whined at Vae to take us back ’cause I didn’t speak the
language.

Never, ever say that to a nendrai. Really. Never. Even
more never than the other thing I said never to say to a nendrai.

She turned and said to me,
If you
can read
this, you’re
too
close
” I can’t remember what she said — not even
the least little bit of what it might be about.

I quite cogently said, “What do you mean?”

She grinned a grin that would have looked quite nice on a
real Orren, and said,
“Repeat after me — If you
can read
this, you’re
too close

So I said, “Um, OK. If you

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<p style="border: 1px solid black; padding: 3px;"><strong>Originally published at <a href="http://sythyry.com/2005/06/425/">Sythyry</a>. Please leave any <a href="http://sythyry.com/2005/06/425/#comments">comments</a> there.</strong></p><h2>In Which Vae is a Worse Monster [24 Lage 2461]</h2> <p> Umtangeia &#8212; or, rather, the city of Bfelmykh on Umtangeia<br /> &#8211; isn&#8217;t a very nice place. First of all, I knew it wasn&#8217;t<br /> a <b>proper</b> city, because a proper city has<br /> mighty city walls which nobody can teleport through, and Vae<br /> had just teleported us to standing in the middle of a street<br /> without even setting off any sort of alarm that I could hear. </p> <p> A proper city also has streets made out of split boards or<br /> something else smooth, not just mud. </p> <p> The buildings in a proper city are elegant and well-made,<br /> and painted and such as that. These weren&#8217;t. </p> <p> But most importantly, the people in a proper city are Orren<br /> and Rassimel and Cani and Herethry and a few other people.<br /> These weren&#8217;t. They were blee and mherobump and taptet and<br /> whatnots. </p> <p> They stared at us. They stared a great deal. They started<br /> talking energetically in a language I didn&#8217;t catch more than<br /> one word in thirty of. Those words being &#8220;Zi Ri&#8221; and<br /> &#8220;Orren&#8221; of course. </p> <p> I whined at Vae to take us back &#8217;cause I didn&#8217;t speak the<br /> language. </p> <p> Never, ever say that to a nendrai. Really. Never. Even<br /> more never than the other thing I said never to say to a nendrai. </p> <p> She turned and said to me,<br /> &#8220;<span style="color:black; background-color: black">If you</span><br /> <span style="color:black; background-color: black">can read</span><br /> <span style="color:black; background-color: black">this, you&#8217;re</span><br /> <span style="color:black; background-color: black">too<br /> close</span>&#8221; I can&#8217;t remember what she said &#8212; not even<br /> the least little bit of what it might be about. </p> <p> I quite cogently said, &#8220;What do you mean?&#8221; </p> <p> She grinned a grin that would have looked quite nice on a<br /> real Orren, and said,<br /> &#8220;Repeat after me &#8212; <span style="color:black; background-color: black">If you</span><br /> <span style="color:black; background-color: black">can read</span><br /> <span style="color:black; background-color: black">this, you&#8217;re</span><br /> <span style="color:black; background-color: black">too close</span>&#8221; </p> <p> So I said, &#8220;Um, OK. <span style="color:black;<br /> background-color: black">If you</span> <span<br /> style="color:black; background-color: black">can read</span><br /> <span style="color:black; background-color: black">this,<br /> you&#8217;re</span> <span style="color:black; background-color:<br /> black">too close</span>&#8221; </p> <p> And she whacked me with her tail, and dumped a big horrible<br /> Mutoc Mentador Spiridor spell on me. I tried very hard to<br /> resist it, but, well, don&#8217;t be silly. </p> <p> And I could understand what the monsters around me were<br /> saying. </p> <p> (No, of course that&#8217;s impossible. Spells can&#8217;t manipulate<br /> languages &#8212; languages aren&#8217;t real things, in the same way<br /> that a flock of birds or a spoken word is a real thing.<br /> Rather later on, with the help of the Eye of Mirizan and<br /> Melizan and two magic theory professors, we figured out that<br /> she had changed my memory of the phrase &#8220;<span style="color:black; background-color: black">If you</span><br /> <span style="color:black; background-color: black">can read</span><br /> <span style="color:black; background-color: black">this, you&#8217;re</span><br /> <span style="color:black; background-color: black">too<br /> close</span>&#8220;, which she had just given me, to a copy of her<br /> own memory of the local language.) </p> <p> Mentador magic is unambiguously the wickedest of the 7+12<br /> kinds of magic. Mutoc Mentador is arguably the wickedest<br /> kind of Mentador, since it changes your mind and your<br /> thoughts, in ways you can&#8217;t necessarily figure out yourself.<br /> Casting a big Mutoc Mentador to rewrite a chunk of someone&#8217;s<br /> mind is &#8230; like doorwaying on a personal scale. It&#8217;s one<br /> of the nastiest, vilest things you can do to someone, even<br /> if there aren&#8217;t any bad effects in the end. </p> <p> I will admit that I said a few unkind and ungracious things<br /> to Vae at that point. Indeed, I will admit to going into<br /> a bit of a frantic terrified rage at her, while blee and<br /> mherobump and taptet watched me, quite bemused, and a<br /> wrapped book of stories hovered patiently behind me, and a<br /> truly horrible monster blinked big wide Orren eyes at me and<br /> didn&#8217;t understand at all why I might be upset.</p> <p><script type="text/javascript">SHARETHIS.addEntry({ title: "", url: "" });</script></p>
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