Sythyry (sythyry) wrote,
Sythyry
sythyry

Originally published at Sythyry. Please leave any comments there.

How To Be Traff Properly, or, How To Gleep Properly [5 Lage 4261]

(reprise) Me:“Tethezai? How do I be traff properly?”

She gleeped. Dustweed flattened zir antennae.

After a certain amount of degleeping, Tethezai looked
straight at Dustweed and said, “Fall in love with a member
or two of the wrong species and devote yourself to them
completely.”

So it was now my turn to gleep, and I trust I did a fine and
elegant job of it. For Tethezai has not particularly been
following that advice. Indeed, she has been quite
incompletely devoted to Dustweed. I know for a fact that
she has had five lovers of three different species — one of
them Rassimel, like Tethezai! — since she and Dustweed have
been officially and notorizedly and notoriously in love. I
doubt I know the whole of the story: just the bits where
Dustweed comes and mopes on me.

I assumed a dignified and meditative posture, as if I was
contemplating Great Acts of Magic or something like that
that Zi Ri are supposed to do now and then, for some
moments while Dustweed made a few mild and gentle comments
to Tethezai, and Tethezai both apologized and refused to
apologize. I was, indeed, contemplating Great Acts of
Magic. I was wondering if it would be magically feasable
and socially acceptable to make a talisman that transported
me into tiny pocket universes, for use in situations (such
as this) in which any concievable thing I could say would be
socially awkward unto death and/or hideousness.

Tethezai:[when the bickering was evidently
over.]“I’m not specifically transaffectionate. I’m a
technically a libertine, which is to say, I am exploring a
wide range of experiences. Rather to my surprise, they
included falling in love, but that wasn’t part of my
original plan. I don’t think you want to do that. I think
you want Orren ’cause there’s no Zi Ri around. “

Me:“A lozen’s no use to a hungry man unless
he’s near a bakery, is what Floooosh always tells
me….”

It was now Dustweed’s turn to gleep, which zie did with
considerable force: a mighty gleepage which knocked zir
chair over and hurled zir out of the room. More precisely
zie stomped out of the parlor, and snarled something about
waiting in zir bedroom until the pervert’s conference was
over.

Tethezai gleeped again. I expressed incomprehension. She
reminded me that she was Dustweed’s bakery, and that
Dustweed hates being reminded of all the usual things.

I tried to interrogate at her a bit more about traffianity
(as distint from libertineianity), but her mind was clearly
elsewhere, probably where her heart was also. In not very
long, her pudenda (and presumably the rest of her) were on
their way there too.

I am currently procrastinating. When I am done with this
paragraph and the one following it, I will write a short but
intense apology to Dustweed.

Which should be any second now … there are 27 seconds in a
minute … 27 minutes in an hour … 27 hours in a day
… 27 days in a month … in a month Dustweed will probably
have forgotten about the whole thing … in 27 months I will
probably be less embarrassed … I think I will switch to
transient paper in order not to have a permanant
record of procrastinating … [Sythyry has stuck two sheets
of scrap paper covered with wandering and occasional
doodling into the journal. I won't translate it ... I can't
understand most of it. -bb]

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