Sythyry (sythyry) wrote,

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The Spontaneous Unplanned Annual Library Riot

[For an important OOC announcement about Bard's life, see beetiger, here.]

It would be traditional, I suppose, to rant long and loudly about the wickedness of librarians. Each year on this day, there is a traditional spontaneous unplanned annual riot in front of the Vheshrame Ducal Library, in which students burn books and destroy paintings. Well, after the first traditional spontaneous unplanned annual riot some thirty years ago, the books have been made of waste papers sewed together the night before.

Mine was notes for papers of last term, plus a few old broadsheets which I found in a large stack in the corner of the kitchen, which some Herethroy has neglected to throw out, ever, since zie moved in, despite the chore list. I titled it, "Dialogs on the Posterior Atmosphere" [A play on "Dialogs on the Interior Atmosphere", a classic work of World Tree philosophy. -bb].

I do wonder what will happen if the library fee is ever revoked, as the students have been demanding these last three decades. A third of a lozen [approx three US$ -bb] a few times a week to go and read isn't that terrible for me (Hezimmikainen is no longer so annoyed with me that zie won't give me pocket money), but some significant fraction of the studentry are fifth children, or scions of impoverished nobility who have mortgaged their ancestral holdings for the tuition, or farmers's daughters or tailors' sons sent here on a scholarship by some lord or other who pays the large bills but neglects the small ones.

In any case, it was a fairly fun traditional spontaneous unplanned annual riot. There were spontaneous, unplanned, incendiary speeches by many students, many of them with extensive footnotes and spontaneous, unplanned, incendiary three-page handouts.

The adminstration, as personified by Dean Carsnell, presented their rebuttal. The basic logic of the rebuttal was "No, we shall not remove the fee; we shall crush any sign of protest beneath our iron boots, like a Zi Ri's forepaw." If I had antennae or external ears they would be permanantly flat! Still, I was paraded around as a symbol or mascot of student resistance, on a few Orren shoulders, and even asked to set some books alight for the subsidiary bonfires.

(The main bonfire, as is traditional at spontaneous unplanned annual library fee riots, was ignited accidentally when someone accidentally shoved an uninvolved student who happened to be walking through the riot area without noticing it, who tripped and fell upon one end of a board, which was balanced on another board, which flipped some other student's pen knife out of its sheath, which went flying into the air, severing a rope which held a torch on the side of Gimbestical Hall, which landed on an open bottle of lamp oil just as, elsewhere, three enraged students threw three textbooks (evidently about last month's news) at three professors who nimbly dodged them so the textbooks landed on the oil just about when the torch did.)

Some senior students happened, by some surprising coincidence, to have a gigantic sugar-cake model of the library on a huge plank. Flooosh was smirking --- Flooosh happened to show up, despite she's not a student and works some distance away from the library.

When I got back home, Dustweed had tied a handkerchief to our bedroom's doorknob. Later that evening, when the handkerchief came off, Tethezai was smelled leaving the building. (By Havune -- Tethezai isn't so pungent that the non-Cani can smell her! Unless Dustweed's gotten a detailed sniff.) Dustweed absolutely refused to discuss the incident, though.

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