Dominance in Romance[9 Thory 4262]
Mynthë and Seeks-Asparagus were having some sort of argument when I got back from work, but they stopped before I could hear what it was about.
Mynthë:"How's your nendrai?"
Me:"She's her own nendrai. Mostly mooning over her girlfriend. Wondering whether it's polite to ask for a certain modest degree of physical intimacy on the next date, or whether Oixe (who is older and kind of has affan in the relationship except that nendrai don't have real affan) gets to do that."
Mynthë:"What did you say?"
Me:"Explained the Cani, Rassimel, and Orren manners on the topic." Which are all different -- Cani are the most organized, of course, and Orren are the most slapdash. Are you surprised?
Seeks-Asparagus:"Not the Zi Ri manners?"
Me:"I don't know the Zi Ri manners. It's never been relevant for me, and given that I'm traff, it never will be."
Seeks-Asparagus:"Pity! It seems to me that lizard manners would be most like lizard manners."
Me:"Actually no, the Cani manners were closest. Nendrai have dominance contests for important stuff. Only they have stupid ones. Oixe and Vae had a big physical fight to decide which of them was going to be dominant romantically. What sense does that make? Compared to Narngi and Havune, I think it was, having a contest of essay questions about marital judgments to decide affan in a marital matter."
Mynthë:"How would a romance contest work? Each one brings flowers and candy, or writes the best love poem, or things like that, and whoever does best, wins?"
Me:"I don't know how Cani do it, exactly. I think Cani romance starts out with mutual sniffing, then coitus, then risky things like cooking for each other and buying perfume."
Seeks-Asparagus:"That's not exactly right. You'd better figure it out before you get to one, if you're really so traff as all that!"
Me:"I don't think Cani are next on my list."
Seeks-Asparagus:"Still on Orren?"
Me:"Oh, no. I swore off Orren, remember?"
Seeks-Asparagus:"About fifteen times. Sometimes for as long as two days."
Me:"Well, yes. Well, this is different. The last person I kissed wasn't Orren, and I hope the next person I kiss isn't Orren either."
Mynthë and I grinned secretly at each other. Seeks-Asparagus just flicked her tailtip.
Me:"Don't be twitchy, Seeks-Asparagus! If you wanted to kiss me, you had plenty of chances last year. Last week even!"
Seeks-Asparagus:"Sythyry, please don't flirt with me. You know better."
Me:"Well, please don't get annoyed with me for doing something perfectly reasonable with someone else, then!"
Seeks-Asparagus:"Fine, then. Get yourself out of whatever holes you find yourself in. I've got to go riding with Nestrune soon anyways. Sythyry, Mynthë, be good, good bye."
Me:"What's gotten under her fur this time, I wonder?"
Mynthë:"She thinks I'm after you so I can get to Vae."
Me:"I think Vae can take care of herself. Unless you're intending to fight with Oixe for Vae's hand ... tail ... whatever. I'll be rather impressed if you survive a ninth of a minute against Oixe."
Mynthë:No, not like that. Traff yes, monster lover not so yes. But yes, all the teratology students are interested in Vae. As a research subject.""
Me:"I could introduce you. It usually winds up with the prime being horribly transformed, the nendrai in furious tears, and me trying to fix things as best I can, though."
Mynthë:"I'm actually about three-quarters of my way through my thesis in minor civilized monsters. Some students might run out there for research purposes, for me it'd just be a distraction. I might like a chance to do some fieldwork with minor civilized monsters, instead of just reading about them, but I know that's not so very safe."
Me:"So you're not kissing me hoping to get at my awful friend?"
Mynthë:"I've got about three ulterior motives, I think, but doing research on Vae sure isn't one of them."
Me:"Oh, good.... What are the ulterior motives?"
Mynthë:"If I told you, they wouldn't be ulterior, would they?"
Me:"Well, no, but they might be easier to accomplish if I'm helping with them!"
Mynthë:"True enough. Well, one of them is making time with our famous, important, and sorcerous club-duke!"
(For reference: yes, I am easy to flatter. Please help!)
Me:"That certainly will work better if I cooperate!"
Mynthë:"May I bribe you with flowers?" Zie offered me a ribbon-garland of blue slaenflowers and tharchies. "I'll help you tie it on, even."
(For reference: yes, I am easy to bribe. Please help!)
Me:"Thank you, Mynthë! Um ... if we were Cani, I think you would have just won affan in romance over me."
Mynthë:"If we were Cani, we wouldn't be dating. But I'd be glad to be Cani for you if you'd like to try it. And if you can give me the bound Cloak of Another God of course."
Me:"I like Herethroy, really!"
And we weren't that far from Ghaln-Yastrou Park then, so we found some big flowering pilipala bushes to hide behind. Zie tied the ribbon around my hind legs and tail, which doesn't quite count as heavy petting even though zir fingers were in just about some of the right places. And we kissed a few more times, too.
I have definitely had worse weeks than this!