The Jealousy of Nendrai [6 Nivvem 4261]
Vae:"Hiio! And are you all doomed over something, Sythyry?"
Me:"eI don't think so."
Vae:"The latest you've ever been is today, so I was wondering me if there was a trouble of some sort on you."
Me:"I'm sorry! Were you waiting here for me?"
Vae:"Not I! The home is a good place for me to wait, while a silky little elemental I made waits for you."
Me:"What do you do in the daytimes?"
Vae:"The scrying, as much as anything, to know who and what is moving in the territory I claim for my own. The occasional bit of natural philosophy. The very long range diamond chess game with a chromodon. The trading plants for trowels with offworlders. Boring things: I'd rather have a good book, if you've brought any."
Me:"Not much like my girlfriend!"
Vae:"And there's new girlfriend on you?"
Me:"An interesting choice of preposition! No, if anything, I was on her. I am not generally tough enough to support the weight of a whole Orren."
Vae:[In the Nice Language]"You know what I mean! Do you have a new girlfriend?"
Me:[Still in Ketherian]"Yes! A very sweet Orren woman named Jinthinia."
Vae:"And she is not much like me?"
Me:"Well, no. She dances, she swims, she works a lot, she practices at weapons, she doesn't read much."
Vae:"The I practice at weapons!"
Vae:"Oh, yes. Mostly in a pocket universe, like. And what else is she about?"
So I described our dates.
Vae:"When she serves you adequately-cooked cheap foods, you mate with her? Is this the usual practice among primes?"
Me:"Well, Ilottat got me with some very exquisite foods. I think Jinthinia will be much nicer though."
Vae:"And mediocre foods make her a nicer lover?"
Vae:"Not a bit of romance among primes do I understand!"
Me:"I shall bring you several cheap romance novels. Then you will understand fully."
Vae:"The juvenile romances, if you please! Not yet of an age to read pornography am I!"
Me:"I think there are some choices in between."
Vae:"Not yet anything too hard to read, truly. The last book you brought me made my head spin, for Ketherian is not such an easy language to read."
Me:"I'll remember that for three days hence. For now, I have bought you berry muffins, and a puzzle of paper cones."
Which left Vae writhing around and gasping in pleasure, and rather irritated at the same time. She started to complain, several times, and finally bit a big chunk of skin and muscle from her right foreleg and uses agonizing Mutoc to heal it to recover her mental balance. (If, indeed, any mental state which requires biting and painful healing to recover can be called balance.)
Vae:"The certainty is on me that you're in love now." She looked distinctly upset.
Me:"I am, yes, but why do you say so?"
Vae:"For you bought me just such a puzzle in the middle of Surprise, and I didn't much like it then, and now you've brought me another, and I still don't much like puzzles, and they're even more boring the second time around!"
Me:"Meep! I'm sorry!" Which was actually true.
Vae:"Also I still had to get one of those cursed orgasms from it, and I know I would if it was the eighty-fourth one no matter how much I hated it, and I wish I got to have my own mind. The terrible excuse for a nendrai I should be, and get killed soon, and maybe Gnarn will reincarnate me as ... I don't know. Something that she doesn't care about." She was crying about halfway through this, shards of glass ripping through her eyelids, and she absent-mindedly wrapped a spell around her head that teleported them off to somewhere.
Me:"Don't do that!" The first few times she had talked about suicide sorts of things, I just listened and rather hoped that she would. But I'm fairly sure she's not going to do it -- even if she can, which I am not sure of. So the current strategy is to look sympathetic and encourage her to live, and, presumably, keep her trust that way. Also, I suppose she's a friend, even if she is one that my home city would prefer dead, and I don't like the thought of encouraging a friend to kill herself.
Vae:"And why not?"
Me:"Technically? Your spirit is probably only suited to being a big monster -- Gnarn wouldn't use it for much else -- and you're probably happier off as a nendrai than a chromodon. Personally? I'd take it as a distinct insult if you killed yourself over a paper cone puzzle that I had bought for you. It'd be completely different if you couldn't do the puzzle, of course." Or some such.
Vae giggled. As usual, that meant the angsty-storm is over, but that she's not so angry that she'll rampage around and explode trees and turn pigeons into misshapen lumps.
Vae:"The anyways! Get me new romance novels next time. The I am so bored of the books I that I am changing my memories of them to be all wrong, and then rereading them again."
Me:"I will! In less of a frantic hurry this time, even."
Vae:"The good! The other thing, here is a glob of purple amber shot with cyan from the forests of Gxheragum Ghragum. My half of the trade, like."
Me:"That's pretty... Is it magical?" It wasn't, which is always easier to deal with. "I'll try not to embezzle too much of it." I made a mental note to write down my embezzling and give to Lord Eddarna; I had been a bit careless of late.
Which is to say, it was a pretty ordinary ambassadorial-level encounter with the weepy beast, and a lot less devastating when it's just an experienced (if, apparently, somewhat clumzy) Zi Ri arranging matters rather than a desparate both-female disgused as a male Rassimel, say.