Aggrivated Agrimony [22 Oix 4261]
- That Agrimony threatened Dustweed with indistinct woe if zie continued to be a both-female
- That Agrimony hated Dustweed for being a both-female.
- That Agrimony knocked a plate of plue and tarrissy out of Dustweed's hands at dinner. (I didn't know this before, exactly, but it's quite a serious charge. Plue and tarrissy is just about how you say "food" for Herethroy: a meal is plue, tarrissy, and maybe some other things. An assault on someone's plue and tarrissy is tantamount to an assault on their right to eat, and, thus, to live.)
- That Agrimony calls Dustweed as "her" rather than "zir", and generally treats zir as a female.
- That Agrimony is frequently and loudly disparaging of Dustweed's involvement with Tethezai.
And of course Ghirbis and I were chosen to investigate and judge Agrimony for his alleged crimes against Dustweed. The Cani would have been the right choice, but the Cani were off at a wedding or something.
So I was made the Master of Ceremonies and the mediator, and Ghirbis the dismediator. (For those of you with barbaric codes of law: everyone in the room gets to speak in turn, three times 'round for a usual case in a real court, two times for us. I, as Master of Ceremonies, get to shut people up if they're being long-windede and such. When it's the mediator's turn, zie proposes some compromise which zie thinks will be agreeable to everyone and settle the matter, and, if the parties all accept it, it is done. When it's the dismediator's turn, she proposes some punishment of some or all of the people involved. If, by the end of the trial, not everyone has accepted the mediation, then the dismediation is imposed on everyone.)
The First Time 'Round
Dismediator:"I propose that Agrimony find lodging outside of Quelldrie House, if he finds their lives and loves so vilesome."
Dustweed and Tethezai:A brief statement of the points above.Agrimony:
- What I really said was, I wouldn't consider a romantic involvement with her while she continues to be a both-female. It's a rather different thing.
- I don't precisely hate her. [Lit: "the girl", emphasizing his opinion of Dustweed's gender in a way that is not quite natural in Ketherian. -bb] No, not "zir", "her". "Her" is the proper pronoun. I don't want to be associated with her, which is not, precisely, hate.
- I also knocked a pitcher of water out Anoof's hands in the same incident, but nobody accuses me of denying him hydration! I tripped, I fell, I nearly knocked the breakfast table over and nearly cracked my chitin at it. If that's an assault on Dustweed's right to live, it's nearly as much of one on mine own.
- Yes, I call both-females "her", because that is the gender which everyone of any intellect and tradition assigns to both-females. I know she doesn't like it, but ... tough. She might as well wish to be Rassimel.
- Yes, I do not approve of such blatant and romantic transaffection between Herethroy and mammals. If you're going to do it, do it like Sythyry and zir Orren, just for the sex without any pretense of caring or intention of getting married or any such thing.
It was the mediator's turn to go next. The mediator took a moment to recover from Agrimony's verbal belly-kick. Finding a compromise here was rather a challenge.
Mediator: The mediation is that both sides should write a detailed apology to the other, showing appreciation of the other's point of view and of the other's essential needs. And that both sides should endeavour to arrange their schedules so that they don't meet very often. Since a majority of the residents of the house (counting by rooms, that's three out of five) are traff, and since his objection is in part to transaffection, Agrimony is obliged to work harder than Dustweed and Tethezai.
Dustweed:"I'm not traff. I just love a Rassimel."
Tethezai:"I'm not traff. I'm a libertine."
Ghirbis:[sung]"I am not traff any-the-either-more! I am just sleeping with Cani street vendors to distract attention from my actual and more insidious crimes!" This sort of thing is how I know my Evil Roommate is actually Evil.
Mediator:"Does everyone accept the mediation? Does anyone accept the mediation?"
And, much to my surprise, they did.