Sythyry (sythyry) wrote,

Piffish Noodles and Pain [18 Chirreb 4261]

I duly delivered the piffish noodles to Vae, along with the paper that she requested. (She is going to write a story, with prime characters, sort of along the lines of the childrens' stories I've been selling her. She wanted to write it on prime paper, therefore. (I think she's fishing for good things to get from Vheshrame -- the fact that she generically craves prime things doesn't mean she wants anything in particular. Or anything sensible.) I promised her I'd read it. I'm sure I'll be able to find something polite to say.)

That is not true of all her artistry.

Vae:"There's a little present I made for Real-Eel, like. Since I can't send the Vingi of hers off to the wherever of his."

Me:"Well, that's nice and polite of you. Nothing that would get her in trouble with the Duke, I hope?"

Vae:"No, just a mouse."

Me:"Well, I daresay the ducal taxes on mice aren't so large. May I see this famous mouse?"

Vae:"Oh, my surely!" I am annoyed with her, so I am translating her a bit more literally than I sometimes do. She was speaking the Nice Language, which she often does to me. I don't generally speak it back to her.

I am annoyed with her because it wasn't a very pleasant mouse to look at. It was an even less pleasant mouse to be, I think. It was trapped in a little bubble of braided places, so it could run for yards and yards, without ever leaving the palm of your hand. It was being chased by little fire wasps. Every once in a while, a tiny rabbit-goblin would appear and ram a tiny Locador-composed needle through its paw, and then heal it with a really nasty jagged Mutoc healing spell.

Me:"Um ... Vae? What is this about?"

Vae:"Oh, nothing but a model is it, but it's neat and appealing. The thought's on me that Real-Eel would like it."

Me:"I can't think why. She's not wholly horrid."

(I just realized that I called Vaisessasilmin wholly horrid, which probably isn't wise. Either she didn't notice, or she didn't want to argue the point. (Yes, she is wholly horrid, but at least she doesn't take offense at me very easily.))

Vae:"I hope she likes it."

Me:"I suppose we can give it to the Sleeth." Then something wholly horrid occurred to me. As I get more used to Vae I should start to realize these things earlier. "What's it a model for?"

Vae:"Oh, it's some Gormoror assassins from Psent who need their punishing. It's bone insects painted green they are until I decide what to do with them.... Is there a good idea with you, Sythyry?"

Oh, dearie.

When a monster, whom you are ambassador to, kidnaps some foreign primes who were trying to kill her and asks you for help torturing them, you should:

Urge her to let them go ('cause they're primes)
Suggest something really cruel ('cause you're supposed to be a sympathetic ambassador, and they're only foreigners)
Suggest something really cruel ('cause they're would-be murderers.)
Recommend that she turn them over to Vheshrame law.
Decide to ask the Duke or someone else for an official policy on the matter.
Something else. Please, something else.
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